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  June 26, 2009

  EXCLUSIVE EXCERPT from Forrest's Book "Got Fight"

  EXTRA EXCLUSIVE! Only here at ForrestGriffin.net can you exclusively read part of Forrest's book, "Got Fight" that didn't make it to print!

  Check it out and be sure to click Read More for the entire excerpt!
  
  Dick in a Box By Adam Singer

  I have read Forrest’s book, Got Fight?, and I saw that he gave a lot of advice on picking up chicks. Seriously, I don’t know where he gets the balls. Granted he found a lovely wife, but back in the day, Forrest went out with a gaggle of monsters. We’re talking hippie chicks with smelly armpits, the whole nine yards. And if they didn’t have furry legs and smell like incense, they had something else seriously wrong with them. It’s not like Forrest had to go out with these bestial creatures. He was a cop and often worked in the bars—both of which get you more tail than you can handle. But leave it up to Forrest to find the worst chick out of the bunch.

   

  A perfect example is the time Forrest banged a post-op transgender, or whatever lady boys are called when they get their junk surgically removed. The first time I learned about this was when Forrest, me, and a couple of other guys were lifting weights at the Ramsey Center on the University of Georgia campus. All of us were checking out this Asian chick with massive clip-on boobs, and Forrest begins shaking his head.
  “No,” he said. “That chick used to be a dude.”

  Of course we were curious as to how he knew this. I mean, this chick had on spandex, and between her legs she packed nothing more than a camel toe. After some berating, Forrest gave us the story. I guess he picked this chick up in a bar or some place and ended up banging her. He thought something was suspicious because he kept bottoming out, which is rare considering he’s no John Holms. He ended up going out with her a couple of more times before he put two and two together. However, I strongly feel he didn’t break up with her because she used to be a dude, but rather because she was psycho. So, if you’ve read Forrest book and are currently taking his advice on how to pick up women, chances are you will either end up with a post-op or a chick who lives in a trailer and constantly talks about the glory days of being on the road with the Grateful Dead.

  
  
  Forrest Rebuttal
  
  There is a follow up to this story, and although it’s not entirely redeeming, it makes me a feel a little bit better. A while after I broke up with this chick I got a call from Adam’s brother, Rory Singer, at two o’clock one morning.

  “Hey Forrest. So, I know you were seeing this chick,” he slurred. “Well, she’s here at the bar and kinda. . . you know, kind of giving me (unintelligible slurring), do you mind if I hook up with her?”

  Sleep deprived and not thinking straight, I gave him the completely wrong answer. I said, “Rory, trust me. You do not want to hook up with this chick.”

  “Dude, I’m so sorry. I don’t want to disrespect you.”

  I repeated, “Just trust me, do not do it.”

  I have regretted those words ever since. Sleeping with a post-op is not something you want to be alone in. I wanted to give Rory enough information to do the right thing, but, in hindsight, I should have just lied to him and given him a big thumbs up.
  

  Source: www.forrestgriffin.net

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